MARRIAGE TODAY.
It is , as if each one of us was made incomplete. And we long for completeness. We long for another person, who could complement and complete us. We long to cherish, and be cherished, and soak each moment in true love. Quite a dream! The closest real-life relative of such a companionship is Marriage.
The ancient Hindu way of arranging marriages involved a comparison of the Natal Charts of the two interested partners. The essential idea behind this exercise is simple- People are not right or wrong, but are either compatible, or not with each other. And when one does find a partner that he or she feels comfortable and compatible with, marriage becomes a beautiful reality.
A few people look at marriage as the ultimate restriction. But really, it is liberation. As you walk down the inscrutable path of life, you can be sure of your spouse right behind you. Marriage is an insurance of friendship, togetherness and lifelong companionship. It is a promise to hold onto one another during pleasant breezes, and ripping tornadoes. How liberating can such an unrelenting support be!
In real life though, even the best marriages can sometimes turn mundane, predictable, or worse, lifeless. Yet, if there initially was compatibility and love, all these are but obstacles to overcome and invitations to rejuvenate a relationship that lasts a life time. Some may say, even more.
Marriage is easily the single most important decision of one’s life. True marriages are a coupling of souls – where you find your room-mate and soul-mate, friend and family, all rolled into a single person. When daily chores become an expression of love for each other, and intimacy becomes a cosmic dance, When you complement, compensate and complete each other, then marriage is the single best blessing one can get. This is the perfect marriage. Almost non-existent too.
Marriage is a beautiful experience, and an amazingly peaceful state of life, if entered with the right person and the right expectations. On the other hand, it can also be a soul-destroying life sentence. The stakes are high enough to be a deterrent, one would suppose. But yet, one finds so many young people getting into wedlock for all the wrong reasons. One must remember, marriage is NOT defined as the state of acting to be together as a reaction to active hormones, for the sake of old age security, ensuring two parents for present or future children, social comfort or emotional insurance. Marriage is promise of a partnership- the most beautiful promise ever made.
Like any other partnership, the quality of one’s marriage depends on the partner one chooses. Finding Mr. or Ms. Right appears to be the toughest task. The idea is not to look for Mr. or Ms. Perfect, but for Mr. or Ms. Perfect-for-me. We must look for a match that completes us like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. Where you can still be yourself, and yet feel completely in place. A relationship that demands you to change into someone else – is not worth sacrificing a lifetime for.
Real marriages are more like a game of poker – some skill, some love, and some luck. It is a risky proposition – but also one that offers great returns. For what could be greater than growing old together with a good friend. Of course, the ‘real’ marriage will also need a lot of work. But the work is a labor of love as a couple works together to reach the ever-elusive but promising, destination of true love and companionship.
